I've slept with my friend friend advice
Slept with a good friend ... what now? :(
I (20) need you to cry and for some great advice.
The stupidest thing you can do has happened, even though I've tried hard not to. :(
I met a guy (25) while studying in December. We have been writing every day since the end of March, seeing each other all the time at the university, seeing each other afterwards and making a lot of phone calls, and if so, 1 to 2 hours. Really sick.
He's full of womanizer and tells me everything. Things from his childhood that he hadn't told anyone and that have bothered him for a long time and vice versa. It just works really well - ass on bucket, but only on a friendly basis.
We have said that to ourselves often enough.
I feel super comfortable with him and we have a totally strange relationship, because he often falls asleep on my couch, I'm his pseudo-girlfriend when he wakes up again with a woman who wants to have breakfast with him, etc. .and he is always there for me, advising me on men and helping me to understand a few things - hihi
Three weeks ago we went through a night with my best friend ... in the end three of us slept in my bed and he cuddled with me. Wasn't there. Have done it more often during the days.
A week later there was a party where we were together and he kissed me and I said to him "promise me we'll never sleep together"
They both laughed and agreed that it would only ruin the friendship.
Last week we were celebrating again at a barbecue party. Both drunk again ... and then he slept in my bed and it just happened ... we slept together. Not only drunk, but also the next morning when we were sober. And it was really nice too, he even wrote to me on the same day, contrary to his rules.
The days after that it was different ... but still completely ok
But for four days now, it's been totally shitty. We don't write, we don't make phone calls, he's dismissive and when we see each other at university he's weird too. He's getting out of my way, I have the feeling.
It makes me so sad.
Do you think I've broken the friendship with it? I behave quite normally, because I'm not in love and I don't have any hopes either. It just breaks me in such a way that everything now seems dirty.
Do you think that is so? Will that be again? Am I exaggerating?
Should I just leave him alone for a while ??
Or maybe it's just the exam phase? We actually wanted to study together ..
I would talk to him directly about what's going on. And not "Is everything okay?", But rather a "I noticed that this has been weird since sex and I wonder why." If you are so sure that he has no feelings, you can just mention that it doesn't change anything for you and you still just want friendship from him.
If he can't / doesn't want to say anything about it, I would just leave him alone. Who does not want it, already has it.
I have the same opinion as Urania on the subject.
I just hope it's not that he just wanted to get you to bed.
Or do you rule that out completely?
I called him and asked "Hey, was it that bad sleeping with me?" Of course with a joke, they both laughed and I said "is everything really cool between us or is that between us now?"
and he said no and that we can repeat that, so I laughed and abdicated.
for the first three days after that it was completely normal ... he even wrote to me again on the day he left with me and one day later, when I called him and we talked about it, we still spoke on the phone .
But that was Wednesday
and it's been weird since Thursday evening.
Can't imagine he's in love
and yes, sadly, I think (firmly convinced !!!) that he hardly pushes a woman off the edge of the bed.
When I write to him, something only comes back briefly and that's why I don't even dare to call ... because suddenly nothing comes from him anymore.
* vill he has fooled you and just wanted to get you to bed.
* vill he is in love with you and now offended because you saw him off.
* He's angry because you both didn't keep your promise
oh god, that can be so many things.
wait, drink tea and let him come.
you will not be able to do more.
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